Why women can't commit
Some male readers reacted to my post “Why men can’t commit” Last month (thank you). To be fair I’m writing about women’s reasons this time on why some of us (alright, I’ll include myself) are having a hard time committing.
- We’re afraid of getting hurt. Could be the result of a string of relationships that didn’t work out and each ended painfully (because of cheating, loss of love from the other party, separation because of death etc.) and we just don’t want to ever get hurt that way again. Women are very emotional creatures. Our decisions are even influenced by what we feel.
Living in fear isn’t healthy and I know it well but it’s real and could keep women from pursuing a deeper relationship with the opposite gender which will eventually lead to commitment. Even staying in a friendship long enough to develop feelings is hard. Women dealing with this kind of trauma often scamper off the moment they start feeling something for fear it won’t work out, it won’t last, it won’t be reciprocated, it would end up like the last one, and so why risk getting hurt again when you don’t have to, you can run.
- We’re afraid to marry the wrong guy. Nothing wrong with choosing wisely, after all, we’re the ones who’d have to change our last name and live a life of submission (and the cases of wife batteries have increased in recent years) BUT this could keep us from taking the risk and may end up a spinster for being too picky.
- We don’t like being tied down. You think only single men enjoy freedom? We know we will not enjoy submitting, we like doing things at our will. It’s hard for us to stay with just one guy, the female version of the guy who thrives on quantity. Surprisingly, some men will still take this kind of woman if she’s hot enough. Just like some women will go for a player thinking she can change him – MAJOR MISTAKE!
If you’re involved or falling for someone with these issues, I’d say the same thing I said at the foot of my “Why men can’t commit” post, guard your heart.
Unless you’re willing to wait it out with her and help her overcome her fear by proving you’re trust worthy and you’re the right guy to marry, move on. If her issue's the last I mentioned, don’t wait at all. She won’t be worth it.
- We’re afraid of getting hurt. Could be the result of a string of relationships that didn’t work out and each ended painfully (because of cheating, loss of love from the other party, separation because of death etc.) and we just don’t want to ever get hurt that way again. Women are very emotional creatures. Our decisions are even influenced by what we feel.
Living in fear isn’t healthy and I know it well but it’s real and could keep women from pursuing a deeper relationship with the opposite gender which will eventually lead to commitment. Even staying in a friendship long enough to develop feelings is hard. Women dealing with this kind of trauma often scamper off the moment they start feeling something for fear it won’t work out, it won’t last, it won’t be reciprocated, it would end up like the last one, and so why risk getting hurt again when you don’t have to, you can run.
- We’re afraid to marry the wrong guy. Nothing wrong with choosing wisely, after all, we’re the ones who’d have to change our last name and live a life of submission (and the cases of wife batteries have increased in recent years) BUT this could keep us from taking the risk and may end up a spinster for being too picky.
- We don’t like being tied down. You think only single men enjoy freedom? We know we will not enjoy submitting, we like doing things at our will. It’s hard for us to stay with just one guy, the female version of the guy who thrives on quantity. Surprisingly, some men will still take this kind of woman if she’s hot enough. Just like some women will go for a player thinking she can change him – MAJOR MISTAKE!
If you’re involved or falling for someone with these issues, I’d say the same thing I said at the foot of my “Why men can’t commit” post, guard your heart.
Unless you’re willing to wait it out with her and help her overcome her fear by proving you’re trust worthy and you’re the right guy to marry, move on. If her issue's the last I mentioned, don’t wait at all. She won’t be worth it.
Comments
Mahirap lang if taken to the extreme.